Alright, listen up, y’all. Let’s talk about this Elden Ring thing. Folks keep askin’, “Should this game hold my hand?” Well, I’m here to tell ya, it ain’t that kind of game, and that’s just fine.
First off, them fancy folks who made the game, they don’t care if you’re readin’ some guide. They ain’t built it for that. If you wanna play with a book in your hand, go right ahead. But they ain’t holdin’ your hand, see? They expect you to figure things out yourself, like we used to do back in the day.
Now, I ain’t no gamer, but I heard tell of this “poise” thing. Sounds like you might need a boost sometimes, maybe for 15 or 20 seconds. Or maybe you gotta start some lady’s quest. I don’t know nothin’ ’bout that, but it sounds like you gotta do stuff on your own.
- You got these things called “Flasks” and “Runes.” Sounds important, like water and money. You gotta learn how to use ’em.
- Then there’s “Gear.” Like clothes, I reckon. Gotta wear the right stuff to stay safe.
- And “Stats.” That’s like how strong you are, how fast you are. Gotta make sure them numbers are good.
Folks say there’s different ways to play, different “classes.” Like pickin’ a job, I guess. You gotta decide what kind of fighter you wanna be. A strong one? A fast one? It’s up to you.
This game, it ain’t easy. They throw you right in, teach you a little bit, then let you loose. It’s like learnin’ to swim by gettin’ tossed in the deep end. You sink or you swim, that’s the way it is.
They got this big world, they call it “Lands Between.” Sounds scary, full of mean critters and whatnot. And there ain’t no map tellin’ you where to go. You just gotta wander around, find your own way. Sounds like a good way to get lost, if you ask me.
But that’s the point, ain’t it? This Elden Ring, it ain’t gonna hold your hand. It ain’t gonna tell you where to go or what to do. You gotta figure it out yourself. You gotta explore, you gotta fight, you gotta learn.
Some folks, they need a guide. They need someone to tell ’em every step. And that’s fine, if that’s how you like to play. But this game, it ain’t made for that. It’s made for folks who ain’t afraid to get lost, folks who ain’t afraid to make mistakes, folks who ain’t afraid to die a few times.
So, should Elden Ring hold your hand? No, sir. It shouldn’t. And that’s what makes it so darn good. It’s a challenge. It’s a test. It’s a chance to prove you can figure things out on your own. It’s like life, ain’t it? Nobody’s holding your hand through that, neither.
You wanna play Elden Ring? Then be ready to work for it. Be ready to learn. Be ready to die. And be ready to feel that sweet, sweet satisfaction when you finally figure somethin’ out all by yourself. That’s the real reward, ain’t it? Not havin’ someone tell you the answers, but findin’ ’em yourself.
Now, go on and play your game. And don’t come cryin’ to me when you get stuck. Just keep tryin’, keep learnin’, and you’ll get there eventually. Just like we always done, right?
And remember, it ain’t about the destination, it’s about the journey. And Elden Ring, well, it’s one heck of a journey, even if it doesn’t hold your hand along the way. It’s a tough journey, but ain’t that how things are in this world? You gotta be tough to make it, and this game teaches you just that. So go on now, and see if you got what it takes.
